Some days I get to be a hero to one of my babies. Those moments are my favorite. Not because my children are frightened or upset, but because it gives me an opportunity to show them how we love.

Monkey and I have had some of our best conversations when he’s been scared or overwhelmed. The times that I am his shining light are amazing. The love that I am able to show him the support, the empathy- I believe it’s what will help mold him into a strong, caring, independent, clever man.

I love stroking his hair while I whisper that he’s loved, special, smart, amazing, and how proud I am of him.

I wake up in the middle of the night sometimes and have a small body breathing softly in the dark next to me. I should be annoyed, sleep interrupted, privacy invaded, but I love it. I snuggled into his small, growing body and soak in the smell of him, the warmth of that little person. I know these moments, these shining gems, will begin to get further and further apart. I relish in the ideas of the future: freedom afforded to me again, privacy not just an idea, my own food…

I’m going to miss all the hard stuff. The diapers, crying, whining, everything that annoys me to no end now will one day be what my day dreams are made of. Soft and squishy little people that I created within me.